Meet Maria Esswein | Artist & Art Professor

We had the good fortune of connecting with Maria Esswein and we’ve shared our conversation below.

Hi Maria, how do you think about risk?
When I think of “Risk,” I think about the board game…and how I’ve never actually played!

On a serious note, though, I am cautious regarding risk. However, I have a lot to be grateful for because of the risks I have taken so far. I tend to overthink all possible outcomes a lot to try and prepare for the worst, but I also try to think about two major components:

1. Is this risk really worth it?
2. Will it make me happy in the long run?

I feel especially now more than ever, I am taking a lot of risks in life, but also ones I feel are right for me. I completed grad school and am teaching in a field I love that is 600+ miles away from my family and old friends. My artwork speaks a lot about my relationships with vulnerable topics such as sexuality, emotions, and identity. I am accepted into art shows that require a submission fee. All of these are examples of risks I have taken in life that have been successful ones. Without them, I do not think I would be the same person, and also probably not as happy. It’s still really scary though!

On the other hand, I have taken risks that are not as “fun” and have cost me relationships and money. Other examples would be getting rejections from jobs or artist calls. It is hard to put yourself out there and not know what the outcome of a situation is. While I do spend a decent amount of time thinking about whether the risk is worth the reward and will make me happy, I find sometimes I just gotta listen to my intuition and trust that things will eventually work out.

Let’s talk shop? Tell us more about your career, what can you share with our community?
My work focuses on gender, art, and religion through a feminist perspective. The art grapples with the ideas and misconceptions I have about sexuality, intimacy, and identity. Through soft sculpture, photography, ceramics, and performance, I explore and challenge the set of beliefs and expectations I was indoctrinated in with the metaphorical presence of “ghosts.” Ghosts in pop culture, literature, and media have been an interest in our society, representing several ideas depending on the individual. How we interact with a “ghost” or a past version of ourselves determines whether the experience with this memory was positive, neutral, or negative. I delve into the internal struggles stemming from my religious upbringing by manifesting these conflicts through apparitions and whimsical, child-like forms. By bringing these internal battles into a physical realm, my art invites viewers to contemplate their relationships with memory, identity, and the societal constructs that shape us.

To get to where I am now on a professional level has not been easy. It required a lot of time, dedication, crying, and work. I have had a lot of challenges and growing pains within the past 5 years. I would say one of the bigger challenges was fighting imposter syndrome. I felt like I was never good enough to be a successful artist, let alone a professor. Some artist critiques in grad school I would almost dread because I was terrified they would only confirm the suspicions I had that I didn’t deserve to be there. Sometimes my doubts would tell me I was a horrible professor and didn’t deserve to be there either.

Truthfully, I still struggle a bit with imposter syndrome, but I spend more time nowadays trying to “give myself some grace” (to quote a friend). I am doing the best I can to the best of my ability. I am a human like my students and have off days. Sometimes mistakes happen. I have to reassure myself that my job would not put me in a classroom teaching a subject I know nothing about. Artist critiques are meant to help you grow and become confident in your artwork. I think it is important to give yourself compassion and recognize that maybe the inner harsh criticism isn’t always true. You are doing a great job, and you continue to keep working on your craft to become even better.

I think the most important thing I want people to take away from my story is to be kind to yourself and be happy with your life. For me, it’s creating ghost sculptures to talk about my own experiences. Find what it is in your life that makes you happy, and try to keep it. If something is making you miserable, maybe take a step back and re-evaluate if it is time for change. Also, you are doing a better job than you think you are. Don’t let your inner thoughts control your life and stop you from being your best self.

If you had a friend visiting you, what are some of the local spots you’d want to take them around to?
I live in the Dallas-Fort Worth area. There is a LOT to do, so I think it is always dependent on what you wanna do and what your budget is. Below are some bullet points of places I would recommend:

Places:

– Meow Wolf in Grapevine, TX — an immersive art experience that has a lot of local artists’ works included!
– Trader’s Village in Grand Prairie, TX — possibly the largest flea market I have been to so far (weekends only)
– Denton, TX — the square has a lot of food, drinks, shops, and art vendors to check out!
– Buc-ee’s — I know it is a gas station, but there is something about the obnoxious beaver decor that is fascinating and hilarious to me
– Fort Worth Galleries — Arts Fort Worth, the Amon Carter, Kimbell Museum, Fort Worth Modern Museum, Erin Cluely Gallery
– Dallas Galleries — Dallas Modern Museum of Art, Dallas Contemporary, Gallery Urbane, Craighead Green Gallery
– Cooper Street Antique Mall in Arlington, TX — such an eclectic bunch of stuff!
– Six Flags Over Texas

Food/Drinks:
– Free Play & Cidercave — retro arcade bars with yummy drinks! Free Play has food, but Cidercave has multiple sports, video games, and ciders
– Cinnaholic — I love me some cinnamon rolls!!
– Mad Mike’s in Pantego, TX — mom & pop ice cream shop!
– Abu Omar Halal — great place for euros and shawarma
– Carrollton Town Center — a lot of food, drinks, and shopping
– Rodeo Goat — literally has the best cheese fries I have eaten in my life

Shoutout is all about shouting out others who you feel deserve additional recognition and exposure. Who would you like to shoutout?
A lot of people deserve recognition for where I am today! I have such a massive network of supportive artists, peers, colleagues, and friends who have watched me evolve and grow throughout my artistic career.

My mentors, peers, and friends from Southeast Missouri State University are the reason I am pursuing what I love. They gave me the courage and strength to take a massive leap of faith into believing I could make a career out of being an artist. I have so many people to thank from there — Wubb, Joni, Louise, Emily, Josh, Justin, Hannah & Blake, Kathy, and Carolyn. There are more people to thank, but these are just a few of the incredible art faculty that I have worked with and developed friendships with over the years.

My mentors, peers, friends, and colleagues at both the University of Texas at Arlington and Dallas College made my “leap of faith” a reality. I was a very lost 22-year-old who moved across the country at the height of the 2020 pandemic. I knew no one, and they have made me feel at home. They have also helped me define my craft and become an even better artist and professor. So to name a few of the several people I have to thank, here you go: Fernando, Yana, Benito, Dustin, Darryl, Patricia, Alex, Tommy, Jenny, Cheryl, Justin, Ben, and Patty.

Finally, thank you to my friends who I consider my family, and the family I consider my friends. Without your support, I don’t know where I would be today.

Website: https://mariaesswein.squarespace.com

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/a_glass_of_esswine/?hl=en

Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/maria-esswein-10b85517b/