We had the good fortune of connecting with Bryce McKinley and we’ve shared our conversation below.
Hi Bryce, how has your perspective on work-life balance evolved over time?
There is no such thing as work/Life balance!
I always think of the pastor around easter or the CPA around April 15th, right… Good luck getting an appnt with either of them around those times and Business is just like that – Sometimes you have to go in spurts or sprints and the rest of the time you as a entrepreneur, are setting expectations and managing tension
There is a big difference between Problems to solve and Tension to manage
Alright, so let’s move onto what keeps you busy professionally?
I remember the moment vividly. The night was hot, the air was dense, my emotions were raw and ragged. I had used my gun before and never had it
jammed, and it has never jammed since. But on that night, as I sat in the front
seat of the car that had become my home, with my infant son sleeping in his
car seat behind me, the gun I had pointed in my mouth jammed. Not once, not
twice, but three times.
It was close to two in the morning and I had pulled out my gun to do the
unthinkable. Parked on a busy street on the north side of McKinney, Texas, to
make sure that someone would find my son in the morning, I had succumbed
to my breaking point. The late-night hour had the streets eerily quiet which
allowed me to perform my task. Nearby was a water tower with a patch of trees
and woods behind it. For months I had been parking back behind the tower, away from the passing traffic so my son and I could sleep there undetected.
We were homeless! My car had become our home, and concealed behind the
imposing structure, we were never hassled or bothered there. I had attempted
to stay in shelters, but my son, just a few months old, didn’t do well in shelters
so staying in my vehicle was easier. We had spent several months sleeping
behind the water tower leading up to the night my gun jammed.
That fateful night in September, I had just gotten off the phone with my
brother. We had been discussing starting a new business together. We were both
feeling good, on a high note; we were positive about the opportunities that could
come. But within 20 minutes of hanging up the phone, my mindset shifted back
to my current and desperate reality; homeless, penniless, and in a brutal custody
battle with my son’s biological mother. Months of court battles and lawyer fees
had burned through my savings and sunk me deep into feelings of giving up.
Life had hit me hard, my world was crumbling, and everything going forward
felt too difficult to overcome. With only 32 dollars left in my pocket, I used a
tattered piece of paper to write a tearful letter to my son. I also wrote a letter
to my mom, saying I was sorry and asking her forgiveness. Then, I parked my
car on the busy street, knowing that somebody would find it, find my son, and
find his mother’s contact information in my letter. Like a robot on autopilot, I
pulled out my gun, put it in my mouth, and as I pulled the trigger, it jammed.
A lot happens to a man in that moment; memories, priorities, purpose, regrets,
anger, sorrow, and the fragmented feelings of God all come rushing in within
seconds. With my life flashing before me, I was instantly reminded of my
childhood. I grew up unlike most kids, in a very strict and cult-like religion.
There were a lot of man-made doctrines and heavy persecution if things were
not followed. Despite the strict disciplines, I did learn a great work ethic and
high moral values. When I was 11, my parents separated and my mom moved
out of the cult and into low-income housing in the projects. Like every kid my
age, I got involved in gangs, drugs, and violence. Life was in disarray constantly
and growing up fighting to survive was extremely difficult.
Between 11 and 17, I fathered a beautiful daughter yet got arrested and
put in handcuffs more times than I can count. Not yet 18 and still considered
a minor, I was fighting a hefty criminal case. I was facing multiple felony
counts of manslaughter, drug trafficking, and conspiracy charges. It was not
my finest hour and I knew my life and my future were on the line. Except, God
had another plan for me. All but one misdemeanor was dismissed and I was
acquitted. I got to walk out of the courtroom with time served and was released
into my uncle’s care. My uncle, unimpressed with my lifestyle, grabbed me by my ear and took me to live with him 100 miles away in Davenport, Iowa.
My uncle was a businessman and entrepreneur. He immediately had me
changing my unfavorable habits by putting me to work. He taught me how to
show care and attention to both myself and my potential, by detailing cars at his
car dealership. There, working alongside him, I fell in love with the automotive
industry. I saw how the cars created value, how the salesmen offered a service,
and the customers bought what they wanted to fulfill a tangible need. A few
months later, in the middle of a wintery blizzard, none of the other salesmen
showed up for work. It was the middle of December, and there was no action
at the dealership, and that’s when my uncle said, “If you can sell a car today,
I’ll put you on the sales team next week.” It was my chance to put into place
all that I had learned and shift my life from where I was to where I wanted
to be. That day, with only guts and gumption, I sold three cars! I was on fire!
The next day, I went through the phone book, cold-called people, reached out
to those who were scheduled to come in for oil changes … and got them to
book a sales appointment with me. One thing led to another and more often
than not, that sales call converted them into buyers.
That is when I learned a powerful life-changing lesson of sales; selling is a
service. I saw how mastering the art of conversation and sales — is a service!
With that new entrepreneurial mindset, I became unstoppable. From age 18
to 21, I began dominating the market. In just two and a half years, I became
the number one car salesman in the world! Yes the WORLD! Ford Motor
Company™ recruited me out of my dealership with a multi-million dollar deal,
and had me traveling to struggling dealerships and/or new dealerships where I
implemented what is now known today as the 5-Star Blue Oval Certification.
When you go and drive by a Ford dealership and you see FIVE-STAR certified,
that’s one of my training programs.
That success catapulted me to the top of my industry. I won several prestigious awards in the automotive sector and hold the record to this day of the most
cars ever sold, non fleet, by a single salesman. Multiple other car companies
gave me seven-figure contracts and before I knew it, I had all the ‘toys’ a guy
could buy. I married a woman I had known all my life — my wife’s mom had
been my Sunday School teacher. We had a nontraditional relationship, it was
open, because we didn’t believe in anything conforming, confining, or following
any rules. While technically we were only married on paper for a couple of
years, we had known each other since we were kids.
Over the next five years, I grew my business while my wife grew her two
businesses; a salon with two sites and a daycare with three sites, so essentially she had five brick-and-mortars within her two companies. We were enjoying
life, traveling, overindulging, doing everything we wanted. I was 24 years old,
spending like crazy; owning a $300,000 boat that I was driving once a year,
just for the heck of it. Between the contracts I had and her businesses, we were
doing close to 65 million dollars a year between the two of us. And, that’s when
everything came to a crashing halt.
My wife had a baby with another man. I didn’t see it as a betrayal. We had
an open relationship and I accepted that it had happened, but sadly the baby
ended up becoming very ill. He was six months old and ended up in the hospital.
The doctors mistakenly put a ‘do not resuscitate’ order on him; it was supposed
to be on a different baby in the same room. The doctor panicked when our boy
started asphyxiating on his vomit and didn’t resuscitate him. Over the next
two years, we went through countless legal depositions and lawsuits. It was
emotionally and financially taxing and despite the loss my wife was going
through, all I knew how to do was keep working. While my wife managed her
stress and depression, I was a hard worker, but not a great husband.
When the baby passed, my wife struggled to cope with the loss. I just worked
and worked to deal with the problems. Friday, June 13th, my wife drunk herself
into a slow suicide and that day I got a call she too had passed! That was the
moment I lost it. I just checked out. I mean, drugs, alcohol, and partying in
excess. For a year and a half I slid down the proverbial rabbit hole. One hundred
million dollars in contracts were lost; close to $80 million in cash, property,
and assets swirled down the drain.
It took me a few years to recover and get back on my feet. In 2010, I sobered
up and started returning to the corporate world. I got a contract with Tyco™
Corporation, which had offices in Denver, Dallas, San Diego, and Chicago. I
ended up moving down to Dallas for a promising contract. Things were looking
up and cash was coming in again.
I had met a girl in that period when I lost my mind boozing and drugging.
A few months after I had moved, she found out that she was pregnant. Our son
was born in November, and she moved to Dallas in January so we could try
our hand at being a family. By the end of the month, I realized she had never
actually sobered up. I came home one day and found her in the bed, passed out,
and our baby, who was just a couple months old, was on the ground screaming and crying. There were pills and bottles everywhere. I picked up my son,
went to a hotel, and that Monday I filed for custody. My last $100,000 in the
bank went to fighting for custody of my boy. Due to the drama, and all the
fighting in court, I ended up losing my contract. Down to just 32 dollars and no longer able to afford a hotel, my son and I found ourselves homeless. We
started sleeping in my car. Everything was an emotional blur, and then came
that moment by the water tower.
I remember fighting with the idea of what I was about to do both internally
and externally. As I pulled the trigger not once, but three times, the gun jammed,
and the bullet didn’t come out! I remember thinking this is crazy! Like, WTF!
Come on God, show up! My son was asleep in the back seat, so I got out of
the car and I started screaming and yelling at the top of my lungs. I literally
said, “F#&K YOU SHOW UP!” to God! I was so pissed off and furious at
Him. Now, looking back on it, I see what God did for me; a true blessing. But,
at the time, I was in an agonizing rage that God wouldn’t let me succeed with
my plan. My emotions felt like razors and my heart was gutted with grief. That
was when I knew… I realized… I fully understood…. that I was on this earth
for a reason! I knew that my life was important! I had a purpose for being here!
After the adrenaline had subsided and God’s message was delivered, I got
back into my car and pulled it into our hiding place behind the water tower.
The heat of the night and evening events had caused my clothes to feel wetlike and stuck to my skin. I closed my eyes to calm my breathing and that’s
when I heard my son’s voice speak to me. Even though he was a baby, sleeping
undisturbed in the back, I heard him speak. I know babies don’t talk at that age,
but I heard his voice so loud and clear. It’s the same voice that he uses today
when he yells down the stairs, “Hey Dad, can I go outside and play?” In that
terrible and life-altering moment, I heard his child-filled voice speaking directly
to me. And that voice said, “Daddy, everything’s gonna be okay.”
I heard it clear as day, audibly, as if he was wide-awake and a confident
young boy speaking lovingly and courageously to his father. Transfixed by
his message, I turned around and saw my infant boy peacefully sound asleep.
I can honestly say, I felt his presence; the caring child that would enrich my
life and become my very best friend. He was right there with me in spirit and
in strength. He reminded me of my worth and abilities. I knew instantly that
giving him a beautiful life was a clear part of my purpose!
I settled into a slumber, still broke financially but no longer broken. I knew
both God and my child were a magnificent force in my life and all ‘the things’
I was worried about didn’t matter. His life and my life were all that did.
I awoke the next morning when a call came on my cell phone from Wells
Fargo™ bank; saying I had some fraudulent activity on my account and I
needed to come in to verify some transactions. I drove to the bank and sat down
at the banker’s desk with my son content, looking up at me from his car seat at my feet. The lady at the bank printed off a list of transactions and said that
I needed to verify the last three. I looked down the list and I agreed I didn’t
recognize one specific deposit. She confirmed that was the one that prompted
their inquiry. I asked who was it from? She pulled up the detailed report and
gave me the name of the organization. It was a past client, a dealership I had
worked for. I called them and it turned out they had missed an invoice from the
last quarter and had wired money directly to my account. It was a 20,000-dollar
delayed payment that instantly confirmed to me that God’s hand was at work.
I went out to my car and sat there just crying, praying, being thankful, and
showing gratitude to God. I had gone from a few dollars into my pocket to
having all I needed to put my son and I back on our feet. It may be hard to
believe but while sitting in my car, humbled by all that had happened, I got a
phone call from an apartment complex that I had submitted an application to
a few months before. They asked me if I was still looking for a place as they
had something just open up. Within 24 hours, I had 20 grand in my account
and a crappy one-bedroom apartment for my son and I to live in and call our
own for at least a year. It was heaven.
Over the next few months, I started searching for a new business opportunity.
My idea was to establish myself, then start pitching consulting, go through the
hurdles of entrepreneurship, and create a business by solving a problem and
providing a great service. I was determined to look at everything with an open
mind, knowing that the right and perfect opportunity would arrive. I discovered
some unique loopholes while dabbling in real estate, and that started with me
calling homeowners to see if they wanted to sell their house at a discounted rate.
I began wholesaling real estate, virtually because I didn’t have the ability to
drive all over Dallas with my son, so I did deals over the phone and via email. I
conducted 23 transactions my first month, 37 transactions my second, and that’s
when I knew that I could build a new empire in real estate. I felt excited. I was
inspired again and overwhelmed with joy because I had a small buffer in my
bank account where I could dabble and play while perfecting my business experience and knowledge. And that’s what I did. I dove right in and went to work.
In that moment when the gun jammed, I knew that I had something worth
living for, I was called to be a father, a husband, and a leader — a leader who
stops focusing on being in charge and starts focusing on those in my charge.
Over the last nine years, I’ve rekindled my relationship with my daughter,
remarried an amazing woman, and have been recognized as an international
keynote speaker who has spoken with some of the greatest minds in the world,
to the likes of Tai Lopez, Dr. Greg Ried, Les Brown, Dr. Eric Thomas, and Matt and Caleb Maddix just to name a few. They’ve hired me to tell my story, teach
the sales techniques in my five-step process, and my seven steps to business
that anyone can implement and get better results in their business!
I’ve learned to look at life knowing I can overcome anything and so can
you! Regardless of our circumstances there is always a new or different perspective than the one that is holding you back. I truly believe that life is filled
with explanation. If you live life as if there’s another explanation, you can see
other massive opportunities with all kinds of possibilities. There’s always light
at the end of the tunnel! Think about it this way, when you’re in a shadow of
life, there’s always light, coming from somewhere. So keep pushing. Keep
searching for the light. Trust the process. Let that fire inside of you sharpen
your will. They now call me Coach Sharpen, so my friend, sharpen your skills
and know that the best work you can do is the work that you do on you!
I believe that leaders are readers. Always be reading! If you’re an entrepreneur, you’re a leader. And if you’re not reading, you’re doing a disservice
to yourself and others.
Stop focusing on being in charge and start focusing on those in your charge.
You should be working to serve the people who look up to you and pour your
skills into them.
It was Tim Ferriss who said, “If you win the morning, you win the day.”
Whether your day starts at 4 AM or 4 PM and you’re working night shift, wake up
a little earlier and spend some time with yourself. Put your own oxygen mask first.
Whatever you do, just don’t do nothing! The minute you stop is when your
subconscious plays all the tapes, working against you! You don’t have to be
perfect, you should just strive for progress. Don’t stop. Keep searching. Keep
pushing. Keep going.
If you had a friend visiting you, what are some of the local spots you’d want to take them around to?
I am a sucker for Tacos – So for me I would definitely take them on a Taco Tour around the metroplex to all of the best Hole In The Wall places!
1) Tacos La Banqueta in Dallas
2) Mr Tako in McKinney
3) Taqueria Hernandez in McKinney
That’s a good list to start and of course we would have to go by Hutchins BBQ in McKinney
The Shoutout series is all about recognizing that our success and where we are in life is at least somewhat thanks to the efforts, support, mentorship, love and encouragement of others. So is there someone that you want to dedicate your shoutout to?
So if you ask me 10yrs ago my answer would have been extremely different! But Now, I would have to shout out my Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ and His Word, The Bible!
I’ll Never forget Sept 28th 2011, it was hot and I was sweaty, and after My Gun jamming in my mouth not once or twice But 3 TIMES – I quickly found Christ and He has completely changed my life!
Now that is just a short version of who HE is and what he has done for m, But more so, I have seen Him work so many miracles in my life I could Not Deny His existence If I Wanted To!
Website: www.5HourHomeBuyers.com
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/coachsharpen
Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/brycemckinley/
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/REIResultsCoach/
Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/brycemckinley